Advice and Counselling

What is advice? Advice means that you are asking for recommendation and/or guidance, which is typically the done thing when you are looking for a new appliance or to know the best restaurant for an Indian take out. But how does advice look in day to day life and making decisions that can impact your life, such as, should I break up with someone? Should I leave my job? Should I confront someone because I’m sick of how I am being treated? These types of questions can feel so big and can feel so confusing when battling with your own pros and cons towards a decision. What will people think about me for making this decision? What if? So what seems like the easiest way out, is to ask someone on your own life decision for advice. What should I do?

Advice can cause a deficit towards being able to trust and listen to your own inner voice or instincts. You can begin to rely on other people, yet that person’s advice will come from someone else’s set of life experience from birth and throughout, which will never be identical to your own. You may take the advice and it still feels wrong for you or just does not quite sit right with you, yet it is accompanied with “you should”, then it all becomes so much more confusing. This is because everyone has their own set of experiences, values and beliefs of how we should or should not be, which influence decision making. 

Counselling can help you regain your trust and listen to your instincts and inner voice in yourself again. The counsellor will lay aside their experiences, values and beliefs to help you navigate through your experiences, values and beliefs so that you can hear yourself for what it is that you need. This is what makes a therapeutic relationship unique from a typical relationship. You will get to explore those decisions without advice, judgement, opinions and those pesky “shoulds”. The space is yours, you can swear, go back on yourself, and take your time as the counsellor helps guide you through your process. Yes, it is a process and it may or may not take time, but imagine being able to take control of your own life and decision making!

You can view my Sussex based counselling services that I offer here. I offer zoom counselling so you can be wherever and still have access to me as your Counsellor: